Understanding the following 8 early stage warning signs can help you step back from the brink before you end up with the "wrong person." If you already understand your high emotional intelligence, this step will become easier. Just trust what you see with your eyes and your inner feelings, and think deeply about the meaning behind the other person's behavior.
Before you commit to a relationship, pay attention to these 8 warning signs that your partner may be a narcissist. When thinking about it, remember not to rush to judgment or view it as black and white, but rather think carefully about what personality traits the following concepts represent and how they might translate into emotional abuse in the future.
Expert: Beware of these 8 warning signs to completely break away from toxic relationships with "narcissistic personality"
1. Say one thing and do another
People with narcissistic personality lack self-awareness and insight, and their self-perception is often inaccurate. For example, they may brag about their excellent financial situation, but then have to borrow money from you in two weeks; they may claim that they are good with children, but they may be aggressive with children when they encounter them in the store. Maybe we want to blame the other person for being in a bad mood, or the current situation is special, but you have to note that people with narcissistic personality are likely to be different from their own image.
2. Try to be "cool" and popular
It is a normal desire to want to be liked and accepted by others, but people with narcissistic personality pursue a status higher than everyone else. They always like to be the center of attention and desperately want to gain control of social situations.
Being admired and having a high social status may greatly increase the self-esteem of people with narcissistic personality, causing them to behave more grandiosely, and such people are likely to be grandiose narcissists.
3. Oscillating between concern and indifference
Just when you're about to see through a narcissist's game, they suddenly become extremely friendly. Being devalued by a narcissistic personality and then being loved again may make you feel unprepared, and is a common tactic used by covert narcissists to keep their partners close to them.
4. Want to appear deep
People with narcissistic personalities want others to think they have good taste and depth, and often want to emphasize that their careers, hobbies, and relationships are more meaningful than others. For example, someone with a narcissistic personality may spend thousands of dollars on concert tickets to show off their deeper love of music.
5. Often betray others
People with narcissistic personalities often speak ill of family members or friends when they are not present. Occasionally complaining privately to a trusted person is necessary and human nature, but people with narcissistic personalities will seize any opportunity to gossip about others behind their backs with a large group of people in order to destroy the image of the object of their jealousy. .
6. Likes to make derogatory comments
People with narcissistic personalities like to package derogatory words into compliments or jokes. However, these words can hurt people and make others mind for several days. For example, "If you were more organized, you would be better than you are now." Still successful." People with narcissistic personalities will use this subtle method to gradually reduce their partner's self-confidence, and belittling others will inflate their self-confidence.
7. Often plays the victim
They will act like they have a harder time than others, harvesting others' empathy and resources. If you constantly hear your partner complaining about how miserable his life is compared to others, including how miserable it is for you, then he or she may have a narcissistic personality.
Pay attention to how your new partner behaves when they open up to you - if the past they share is a series of ups and downs that make you feel extremely guilty for ever having an argument with them, that person is probably There is a problem.
On the other hand, if your partner talks about important events in the past and also describes their emotional state and subtle emotional changes at that time, as well as how they dealt with uncomfortable feelings, that person may not have a narcissistic personality.
The conclusion your partner draws after speaking out is also a key to discerning - should they be grateful that the dilemma gave them a deeper understanding of themselves, or should they still insist that they are the victim? If your partner does not bring up the bright side of a difficult situation or gain insight through the incident, the other person's victim mentality is likely to be deeply ingrained.
8. Disagreements escalate into disputes
People with narcissistic personalities cannot sincerely take responsibility for their own actions and therefore always twist situations to blame others. They unconsciously modify the memory in their minds and see themselves as the victim and you as the perpetrator. People with narcissistic personality often project what they have done onto others, and the bad people will complain first. For example, people with narcissistic personalities often accuse their partners of being narcissistic.
When you discover that a narcissistic person is exhibiting emotionally abusive tendencies, you may want to hope that the other person can or will change. However, people with narcissistic personalities lack insight into themselves, are unable to sincerely take responsibility for their actions, and are accustomed to distorting facts. The risk of people relying on narcissistic personalities to mature is extremely high.
Take warning signs seriously and break away from disabling relationships
Please take the above warnings seriously. In an individual incident, you can easily excuse the other person, but over time, if they remain the same, you may find yourself in a dysfunctional relationship. At this time, you need to listen to your intuition, because the narcissistic personality may not reveal its true colors until you let down your guard and become emotionally involved. Once you gain your trust, the narcissistic personality will gradually reveal its tendency to emotionally abuse, and by then it may be too late.
A narcissistic personality will take advantage of your selfless personality to get everything you want, but be stingy about giving. Since you have already devoted a lot of time and energy, you will try your best to make the relationship last. So please use your emotional intelligence properly, judge the relationship accurately after careful consideration, and end it decisively if you find yourself being compressed.